Lack of silence

I'm having one of those weeks where I really don’t know what to rant about. Sure, I could go on about how The Bitch™ called David Gregory a racist in his questioning of Newt, but that's like saying a bleached out Burt doll was racist against the Pillsbury Doughboy. It just doesn’t make sense and most of us can already see it. I could go on about the impending Rapture coming tomorrow, but I have plans. I could talk about the uproar about Obama's Israel/Palestine speech, but the reality is that if you take the editing out the policy isn't anything different than what the last few Presidents has said.

All in all, it's hard to beat John Lithgow's amazing performance of this (the magic starts about 3:15 in, but watch the whole thing to get context):

The Colbert Report
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And I was hoping for  a "Bigbooty/bigbooteh" joke, but alas.

I like to go exploring the interwebtubethingy on Fridays because a lot of truly astonishing crap gets dumped in the hopes that no news organizations pick these things up. Therefore it is time to bring back…

Cheap shots (get your drink on - I counted 7 of them):

Depends on what your definition of "is" is. Take a drink if you get the alliteration.

I have to wonder, now that we're heading for default who places the call to the deadbeat and what phone number do they use?

Those were for on-line colleges? I thought it was for phone sex!

You know, it's obvious but you have to ask, what the fuck have some people been smoking?

The CDC is sometimes awesome.

Now what?

You know, it never would have occurred to me that this was illegal.

Um, that thing in your belly - could it be another kid instead? (Yeah, that was low - I'm an asshole. Take a drink.)

I told you so.

If you live in North Carolina it might just suck to be you, for a whole new reason.

Really? Not "Waterloo"?

Somebody tase this rapturefuck.

Most people like me are going to see a lawsuit coming. I'm wondering if Jim Beam got a similar break.

Does your decision come with a free 2-liter soda?

I bet the truth is that he really asked about the lack of flash on the iPad.

Muslims selling urine-laced popsicles to our children is an epidemic? I think that the whole idea of having a mental filter in one's mind is no longer taught to people. Seriously bitch, think crazy as much as you want but be polite. And stay away from the Tim Burton-themed acid.

Finally, no link, but it's been five month Republicants. WHERE IS YOUR FUCKING JOBS BILL?

And because I love you, Rik Emmett with Dave Dunlop