Mandated morons

Anyone who claims that a mandate is unconstitutional is a fucking moron. The Republicants seem to go off over and over again about the mandate provision of the health care act passed in the early going of Obama's administration, without ever seeming to grasp the sheer idiocy of their position. So here I have created a short list of things that by their logic are unconstitutional:

Driver's Licenses. Hey, if you want to drive legally, you need a license. In fact, in most states you also need to carry auto insurance.

Photo ID. Assuming you don’t drive (or can't) the government still mandates that you carry some sort of photographic proof that you are who you claim to be.

Social Security numbers. If you want to work legally, you need one of these. In fact, the law states that you must have a social security card but that's hard to enforce. But you should notice that you have to actually go and get one as they aren't assigned at birth - even though they're needed for the tax returns of the parent of the child.

Hunting licenses. These are mandated by various states in order to hunt. Is The Bitch™ saying that when she shoots wolves out of helicopters that she doesn't carry a hunting license to do so?

Fishing licenses. See "Licenses, Hunting" above.

Education. You are required to get one in this country if you're a minor. That definition changes from state to state but every state mandates that a child must get an education until a certain age, whether it be at school or at home.

Green Cards. Hey, if you're not a citizen and you're here legally, you have one and you're generally required to have it with you at all times. But hey, furriners.

So unless you're a non-hunting, barely-literate, never-worked-a-day-in-your-life, stay-at-home freak (and there are surprisingly few of these) you should shut the fuck up.

Cheap shots:

So he's saying you should be locked up and/or deported if you attend one of his own speeches?

Dude, I don't mind the helicopter so much, but I have a bad leg and I can fucking walk 100 yards.

But maybe your role model is Jabba the Hutt.

As is often the case, Jon Stewart is freakin' brilliant. Dude, I'm a Californian and I know that you pick it up and fold it.

Dude, I like crawfish too but this is stupid.

Maybe it's time to settle the grey area of this. But these fuckers are cowards.

Yeah, I know, journalism and stuff, but she'd call it a "gotcha". On a side note, she should be careful about wearing this particular piece of jewelry (first picture) - according to her faith it might leave a mark.

Shep Smith really shouldn't be on Faux.

Leslie Nielson gives us one last laugh from beyond.

Yawn.

Today's WTF moment brought to you by a guy who used to sell pizza.

Maybe you should judge for yourself.

There's nothing good about this, but I get the sneaking suspicion that Rep. Weiner is kinda fucking with everybody and smiling privately.

But no one say "blowjob".

And because I love you, Todd Rundgren's Johnson. My apologies for the people talking.